Negaview

Resident evil 5 is the long awaited follow up to the groundbreaking Resident Evil 4 on the gamecube.  The initial video for resident evil 5, however, was met with all sorts of negative press regarding accusations of racism.  Well the game was released and has since sold millions of copies worldwide.  Has the gameplay evolved?  Is the game truly racist?

Yes…. and no.  The gameplay has evolved to include co-op.  You now have a partner named Sheva Alomar, who by the way is the hottest collection of polygons i’ve seen in a long time.    This partner is always with you… stealing your ammo… then using it up… wasting big herbs when there’s no need for it.  Suffice it to say that the AI is annoying.  For example i gave her a machine gun and tons of ammo.  She picks up one handgun ammo box (10 bullets) and proceeds to use the handgun and then BITCH about needing ammo.  Use the fucking machine gun dumbass.  This would of course be easily remedied by playing with another person.  However, in our ‘me first’ society i’m sure your friend would probably snatch more ammo than AI Sheva.  In any case i’m sure this is the ultimate way to experience the game (i’ve only tried split screen co-op).  Along with the co-op brings item swapping.  Which gets even more annoying with the AI since it will not combine stuff.  So you have to try to have an empty slot to constantly swap out and combine the shit the AI is too stupid to do itself.

The core shooting gameplay is pretty much unchanged.  One thing i’m curious about.  These guys are special agents and they can’t move while shooting?  I’m a normal fucking guy who’s shot a gun maybe 2 or 3 times in his life and i’m pretty sure i can riddle out the complexities of moving my legs and pulling my trigger finger at the same time.  However, why they stuck to this gameplay mechanic is completely obvious.  It creates tense action moments and i honestly can’t fault the action in this game as it’s pretty awesome.  So after about 1 level i got over the whole not moving while shooting thing.  It’s just stupid from a logic point of view, but hey… it’s a videogame so maybe i should lighten up.

Now, is the game racist?  No…. and yes?  Initially no.  But then you get to the marshland chapter and there are mud huts and guys in loincloths chucking spears.  Racist?  It never comes across as maliciously racist and you know the fucked up thing?  The very act of my wondering if its racist, kinda makes me feel like a fucking racist.  Like somehow i’m the asshole because i’m attributing the whole loincloth and spear chucking thing to Africans.  Well, fuck you for that Capcom.  How diabolical of you.  Also, maybe it’s just me but it kind of bothers me that i’m playing Chris Redfield and destroying ancient African artifacts to steal the treasures ensconsed in said artifact.  All so i can sell those treasures to upgrade my gun so it will hold an extra 5 bullets.  All the while Sheva’s watching this.  Fuck you again Capcom.

What did this game get right?  Well, i mentioned that the action was fun and tense.  Controls are great once you get used to them.  However, my absolute favorite thing about this game are all the unlockables.  I enjoy raping the land of Africa’s treasures so i can upgrade my guns and unlock the infinite ammo versions of those guns, and there are a LOT of guns.  Mercenaries mode is also quite a lot of fun.  As is unlocking the infinite rocket launcher and just going to town on everyone.

All in all i think you can tell i enjoyed the game.  Sure there are a few annoyances here and there, but there are no perfect games.  Also, fuck you for making me think about race Capcom, you nips. :-p